Choose the right spouse! (“The Two”)

“As Solomon grew old, his wives turned his heart after other gods, and his heart was not fully devoted to the Lord his God, as the heart of David his father had been,”

- 1 Kings 11:4, NIV

In 1 Kings 11:1-13, it was told that Solomon had many women aside from the Pharoah’s daughter. He has wives and concubines that came from different nations – nations wherein God said “do not intermarry with them”. But Solomon, still, chose to love these women and disobeyed God’s command. As he grew old, his wives has lead him astray and made him follow other gods, aside of the Lord his God. God was very angry to Solomon because he turned away from Him, and because of this, God swore that He would tore the kingdom that Solomon has built, but not in Solomon’s lifetime, but in the lifetime of his son.

I believe that these events in this chapter of 1 Kings clearly spoke about the influence that our spouse could give us, especially in our way of living. Solomon’s wives and concubines came from a culture very different than his, and because he loved them very much, he has even adapted their culture – and even worshiped the gods of his wives and concubines. He forgot the covenant he had with God and has followed the other gods – unlike his father David who remained faithful.

The same thing also happens to us when we have a relationship to a woman with a different culture than ours. Because we loved her, we make sure that we adapt the culture of her living – we go to the places where she goes, meet her friends and spend a lot of time doing her activities. We don’t recognize it but we are now starting to love the things she loves until it also has become a part of us. We’ve now forgot that we are Christians and don’t recognize that we are now not living to fulfil God’s purpose for us. That’s the danger of choosing a spouse who has a different culture than ours.

I now understand the reason why our pastor always warned us on having relationships with non-Christians – it is because they could lead us away from our relationship with God! Our pastor always share about the beauty of having a relationship with a woman who is rooted in Christ – the beauty of sharing the Christian culture together and growing your kids with correct values. Imagine how wonderful that is.

Now, the life of Solomon should be a lesson to us. Solomon married women from different nations even though God said “do not intermarry with them” because he followed his own desire. He knows God’s command, but he let his desire go above the command, and this is the reason why he became disobedient, and why God has punished him through his son. We should not follow our desire, like Solomon did, but we must follow God’s desire. And God’s desire, I believe, is this – to marry a woman that will not lead us away from God, but will help us have a deeper relationship with Christ.

Shalom!


Original link for the photo: http://drwetherby.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/relationship-counseling.jpg